But since i m no wordsmith, i ve held back so far...
Ever since i was a teen, i ve noticed, like all of you would have, that boys get more freedom, more choices, less restrictions, less attention(u know what i mean), than us
At home, elder sis didnt get to study engg she wanted, as the money needed was allotted to brother's potential engg venture(didnt happen). Me, i didnt even think of it.
Past school and in college, the usual eve-teasing(what a horrendous term..!), gaping, following, trying to grope, and such stuff, as any teenager would endure, had me thinking.. why is it that only girls have to go thru this..?
When i first joined work, i had to deal with co workers who took pleasure in passing double-meaning comments(i understood the meaning only after a while). I learnt to deal with them very quickly. I wondered if any guy would have had to go thru this..and had me thinking again..
Then for the first time i thought that maybe, if i were born a boy, would life have been easier? I was then just past 20yrs of age.
Cut to the present, after marriage(a very adjustable, soft natured hubby), one daughter(a sweet gal, gud student), i still cant escape that feeling..
Last week, during a lunchtime discussion in office, a collegue casually commented that these days women have it so good.. I begged to differ, and asked him why he thought so.
He chose to take his wife as example, and said "She gets to decide what to cook, what to buy for the house, how to dress the kids, what to buy for herself, how to spend her time in the house.. What more do u women ask for ?"
I said " But isnt all this within the boundaries you set for her ? Suppose she decides to pursue a passion, which requres her to go out of the house, and you will be required to share household responsibilities, will it be okay with you ?"
He retorted " Atheppadi ? Veetukkuleye edhuvena senjukattum. Ippadeyellam decisions edutha she will only suffer..No way.."
Our argument continued on predictable lines, and he laughed it off with "intha kaalathu ladies are very argumentative.!"
My question is, time and again we are told that women are getting better treatment than in the past, but is it really so ? I dont want to discuss about the fate of women in the lower strata of society, what about the creamy layer, us ?
Are we always allowed to dream big ? I dont mean daydream..? NO/YES
Does a man ever feel guilty about not being able to strike a perfect work-home balance..?NO/YES
Can i go out to a hotel for dinner/evening movie alone ?NO/YES
Does my hubby have to worry if the maid does not turn up ?NO/YES
If i dont get that promotion i wanted, how many relatives(inc hubby) would say, "vidathey, adutha vaatti kandippa kidaichidum..entha citykku trf pannuvangannu sonne..?"
All NO and no YES..
Random thoughts such as these and many more cross my mind often, but i m not able to put them to paper right now. U could add to this list, though
Now, please dont conclude that i m a feminist or something. I thoroughly enjoy being a woman, and a mother at that.. Not to forget the lil perks and pamperings we enjoy as 'ladies' . Just that i m going thru a phase where i cant help focussing on the disadvantages we face, as women
Still, as Linda Goodman had written in her book of Sun Signs, like a true Scorpio, i silently wish i had been born a man.. Maybe next time..?
What do you think ?